It's late at night and I can't sleep. This only leads to a vent. Lots of them.
1. I've figured out probably my #2 problem. I'm insecure. Not about like "Ew, I'm fat." or "I don't have enough makeup on, let me cake some more on my face." or anything like that. It's not really about looks or vanity. It's just more about life in general. I think I know why too. My past with people has been quite testing to be honest. Friends and guys, two potential disasters that did rule my life for awhile. Now I'm always assuming that I'm going to be hurt in some way. Especially when it comes to relationships. JL is patient, but I know sometimes I can be downright annoying. I'm just worried and I never feel secure. The deeper I fall in love with him, the more insecure I get. It's like I'm always alert now, trying to forsee something bad before it actually takes place. I need to work on that. It's starting to drive me crazy.
2. Nevermind, I'm tired. My eyes are shutting. Goodnight. Will continue some other time.
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